Take 247
by MisguidedGhostWriter
Summary: Just another RESET. In shitpost format.
1. HIP! HIP! nothing matters

RESET

"Aaahhhgg! Really?! Fucking really?!" Frisk yelled the words shaking their fists at the hole at the top of the mountain and kicking at the flowers beneath their feet. They let out a shriek of utter rage.

"I told you it wouldn't work." Chara stated watching Frisk with tired eyes. "Your body just won't let you die, stupid. It's like trying to hold your breath forever. Maybe you could do it until you passed out, but once you're unconscious you start breathing again. All you stand to get by trying is possible brain damage."

"Oh thanks so much for your fucking sage advice, WHAT would I do without you?" Frisk's irritation and sarcasm only served to make Chara giggle.

"Hey at least you're not a 90 year old anymore. Annnnyway, my turn dumb dumb. Move your butt."

Frisk grumbled a bit but held out their hand for their demon friend to grab. Chara did so, and allowed their spirit to flood into Frisk's body. Frisk felt the world fall from under their feet as they became a spirit.

Chara, now inhabiting Frisk's body, coughed as their breathing synced up. They fell flat on their ass, feeling dizzy, but smiling. They laid out on the flowers. "Oh confines of gravity how I've missed you!" They exclaimed, before sitting up quickly and stumbling over their shoes. "Lets do this, take 247, right?"

"Yup. Let's just go find mom." Frisk muttered, already leaving the cavern.

Chara stood and ran after them, a grin on their face. They loved RESETS. "When we find Flowey," They said, "We should convince him that we'll eat him! Oh, oh, should we go Genocide, or Pacifist?"

"Does it matter?" Frisk asked bitterly.

"Nope! 3 cheers for nihilism!" Chara grinned as the pair plunged into the darkness of the Underground.

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 **A/N: Oh look, I took a break from long things and made a shitpost. Why? Boredom. I might just leave it here, IDK. If you guys want more, just say so. Thanks for reading!**


	2. What's For Dinner? YOU ARE! :D

"FLOWEEEEY!" Chara's voice was a gleeful trill as they haphazardly danced into the dark room. "It's so good to see you again! Been a long time, huh?" They giggled.

"Chara…" Came Flowey's voice, he was waiting in his usual place. "So, Frisk finally kicked the bucket huh? Took long enough. I knew there'd be a RESET. Little twerp just can't stay dead. By the way, hi Frisk."

Frisk gave the middle finger in return.

"They say hi too." Chara giggled. " I think this one is the one. Ya know? There's just a good feeling I get about this RESET! I like to name my timelines, as you know, so I'll call this run 'dinner-tale!'

"Excuse me?" The flower looked up at their old sibling with a raised eyebrow.

"Yea!" Chara patted their belly enthusiastically. "I'm going to eat everyone this time around. Starting with you." Their face turned to black goop, "I've always wondered what a flowey salad would taste like." They laughed, a high pitched demonic sound that could chill the bones of any bystander.

"Really?" Flowey smirked, unimpressed. "Do it then. I dare you."

Chara pursed their lips, then frowned. "You're no fun anymore." They remarked wiping their face.

"And you would never eat me."

Chara narrowed their eyes. "Is that a challenge?" They asked, walking right up to flowey and laying on the grass next to him. They put a DETERMINED look on their face.

"Ch-Chara...hey, cut it out." Flowey leaned back.

Chara leaned closer, their eyes shining red.

"What are you...STOP!" Flowey protested.

In response, Chara licked his face, making an exaggerated "Ahhh" sound as they did. Then they licked their lips thoughtfully, as if taking in the taste. "Maybe you'd be better in a wine…" They mused.

"Eeeww, weirdo!" Flowey wiped his petals with his leaves. "You're gross."

Chara burst out laughing. This run would be a blast.

Flowey disappeared into the ground, leaving Chara a cackling mess.

"Hey, Chara! Tori's coming!" Frisk warned, sounding annoyed.

"Wh-oh! Mom!" Chara looked up to see their goat mother enter the cavern.

Toriel was taken aback. She had just found a random human child rolling around in the dirt, one who had called her…

"Er," She walked up to Chara, looking down on them with utter confusion. "Hello child. W-would you like to call me 'mother?'"

Chara grinned and jumped to their feet. "Ya sure, that sounds cool. You can call me Frisk!" They laughed, giving Toriel a hug. "Nice to meet ya mom!"

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 **Wow! Shit posting is fun! So far I've gotten 2 requests to keep going, so, why not? My goal is to have every chapter in this story under 500 words.**

 **Please review!**


	3. Chara's Not Exactly Sane

"As a human living in the Underground," Tori began, "Monsters may attack you. You will need to be prepared for this situation." Chara listened passively staring down the dummy with their blood red eyes. Intimidating the enemy was always the first step to victory.

Meanwhile, Frisk Ghost was complaining. "Really!" they began, "Out of all the names in the world you stole mine?"

Chara tried not to burst out laughing.

Toriel went on, explaining how they should talk to the dummy. Chara wasn't listening. Eventually, they stepped into battle. Their SOUL floated from them.

"Hmmmm. Have you considered giving the dummy some clothes?" Chara asked, looking to Toriel and rocking back and forth on their heels. "It looks pretty naked. Maybe a suit? Or a dress? A top hat would be cute either way." They mused

Toriel watched with a somewhat concerned expression.

"Also a name would be fitting." Chara went on, Samantha? Samel? I'm feeling Sam, but Jasmine is cute too. We could always name it Fluffy or Spot or bacon." They passed a sly glance to Frisk, who looked back bitterly, as if to say 'i'm sick of your shit.' Chara continued. "Maybe Ariel, or Gigi give the skele boys a run for their money." They chuckled. "What do you think mom?"

"Er...my child, Frisk, don't talk to me, talk to the dummy." Toriel guided.

Chara got a devious expression on their face. "Alright," They turned to face the thing, 'hey dummy, you're in a STICKY situation!" They followed this up by whapping the dummy with their stick, hard enough to knock the thing down. They snorted a laugh turning back to Toriel as the FIGHT sequence ended. They earned 0 EP and 0 Gold. "I talked to it!" They declared.

Toriel looked conflicted. Her face was a mixture of concerned, maybe a touch fearful, and strangely proud of the pun.

"Er, um, I suppose you did. Ahh, but, the dummies are not for fighting. We do not want to hurt anybody...do we?"

"Wants and needs are manifestations of the mind!" Chara declared swishing their stick through the air. "I want nothing. I simply exist. Now, onto more puzzles!" They walked on confidently. Toriel followed, disturbed to say the least.

Chara waltzed into the next room, and it was only a matter of time before they stumbled onto the first froggit. A battle sequence began.

Chara paused, ACT or Fight?

Chara leaned in. ACT: Threaten. "Ribbit, ribbit CROAK!" They exclaimed. They spoke Froggit fluently.

The Froggit looked thoroughly disgusted that such terrible, dirty words could come out of the mouth of one so young. Indignant, he hopped away, passing Toriel who entered the room after Chara.

"What did you say?" Frisk asked, with an edge of amusement to their voice.

Chara giggled, but didn't say more. Their words weren't something they could translate with their mother in the room.

They carried on.


End file.
